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Flight in 2 days

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  • Flight in 2 days

    Hi! I haven't flown in 15 years and have a10.5 flight in 2 days> In the past I used various therapies to get me through. This time I had a 4 months to prepare with a phobia specialist. I am having massive anxiety. I want to take this trip, very much - Its a trip home after 15 years to visit family. I will be devetated if I can't make it. I understand so many things about this phobia, about flying, about anxiety from being educated and working on making progress. Yet, I'm still unable to do these things that can help me, my amegdela takes over. Trying very hard to keep it together. Please give me some kind words. And help me make it. I also have xxana from my dr, which I am on the fence about. I don't like the idea, and also understand that it won't help the phobia decrease. To actually make it on the plane though I may need it. In the past I have walked out of airports. I am very stressed. Having this phobia has stopped me from doing many things and missing important family evetns. Im crying writing this. I have the SOAR app and plan to continue doing what I can to help minimize my fears. Any happy stories t oshare? I'm feeling hopeless right now. Trying to pack.

  • #2
    Unfortunately, there are few phobia specialists who effectively treat fear of flying. Why? They use CBT, and CBT is not effective at controlling high anxiety and panic in the air. Actually, it doesn't do a good job on the ground, either. It is shocking, but only 17% of people treated with CBT become free of panic.

    Compare that with SOAR. In my new book, Panic Free, we apply the method that stops panic in the air to panic on the ground. In the book, I detail how effective the method is in the air and how, without actually trying to, most clients became panic free on the ground as well. You can find the book on Amazon at

    Here is an exceprt from the book about people treated for in-flight panic in the SOAR Course

    . . . nine of the eleven no longer experienced panic in the air. Though the course is aimed at eliminating panic in the air, it also helped clients to reduce panic on the ground. Five of the six who had previously had panic attacks on the ground became panic free there, too.

    Look at those numbers: 81% became panic free in the air, Though we no work to directly apply the method to panic on the ground, 83% became panic free on the ground as well. That's five times more effective than CBT!

    CBT is "cognitive" and when stressed, as you are now, your cognition is overloaded and that leaves you unable to use the techniques you have been taught. You have no cognition left with which to do cognitive therapy.

    This was a problem I discovered thirty years ago when I tried for years to get CBT to work.

    If you want effective help. we can provide it. Time is very short, so I can't promise one way or the other if you have enough time to establish automatic emotional regulation prior to your flight. If you want to try, enroll in one of the courses at and when you get to video clip number 9, call me.


    • #3
      Panic Free: The 10-Day Program to End Panic, Anxiety, and Claustrophobia [Tom Bunn, Stephen W. Porges PhD] on *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. <strong>“HURRY, BUY THE BOOK AND TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE.”<br /> — Marla Friedman, PsyD, PC


      • ladyc
        ladyc commented
        Editing a comment
        Can you tell me what parts of the book will be best read. I have 1 more day to go, but I got it on kindle.

    • #4
      Thank you. I have purchased the 10 day panic free book and SOAR for kindle. I have 1 more day, and have little time to read through everything. Can you tell me what may be the most helpful??

      My therapist wasn't CBT, but we did virtual reality and various others things. CBT in the past didn't work.


      • #5
        I have another's about the memories/person to help produce oxytocin....I'm going through a difficult heartbreak right now. I can't see a person in my mind who brings about those feelings.


        • #6
          How about going back to a much earlier relationship. Event if that old one ended or ended badly, if you go back to the early part of the relationship you can find a good moment.


          • #7
            I'm having a hard time with that. This one has good memories (marriage/kids) but its at a very painful part of the end. Hard to think about the good without all the stress of the recent present.


            • #8
              I wanted to update this post about my recent flights. First all, I want to say THANK YOU to Captain Tom. After 15 years of not flying, I was able to get on the first plane without a panic attack, without medication and with a moderate amount of anxiety. The turbulence was almost constant (weather) and I was able to minimize my fears. I used the 5 4 3 2 1 a LOT. I attempted to use the techniques in the SOAR book and the panic free book. I think I left things a little late, and was not able to practice enough before the flight. I had been working with a therapist for 4 months beforehand, using CBT, other techniques and also VR. I do think some of his techniques helped me - mostly, just don't fight the anxiety, acknowledge it is there and that it does not mean anything bad is actually happening. Captain Tom talked to me two times while I was at the airport before this first flight, thank you so much. The 3 hour drive leading up the flight, I was able to read the books, work on various methods.

              The flight home was a little different. I was coming back to a stressful situation. I had also had a very difficult week with lots of major life stressors. I did not have chance to review anything in the books and I drove the 3 hours to the airport this time. My anxiety was minimal until after security when I had a panic attack. I was able to come out of it after about 5 mins, but was mostly a mess after that. I had very very strong urges not to get on the plane. I was sick to my stomach and had dry heaves. I called captain Tom and he got back to me and talked to me while I was on the plane. I am typically well composed, educated coherent adult. I had a very hard time. I managed to stay on the plane,. though had a very difficult time doing the 5 4 3 2 1 , just was in a real panic state. BUT after tke -off within about 15 mins, I was calm and composed for the next 11 hours of the flight. I was able to use the techniques, and especially what I had learned about turbulence was helpful. We had a lot of turbulence and so I was able to practice most of the flight. I did not suffer for 11 hours. Which is incredible. Even though I had a very rough 1 - 2 hours at the airport and once I boarded, the rest was very very manageable.

              I am looking at other flights and want to book something before November, and will likely purchase the entire program here. I believe my phobia has prevented me from so much travel. I am amazed that my first flight produced so little panic, using the techniques. It took work, but I was not a completle mess. The flight back, unfortunately, was difficult for me for a short period of time - anticipatory anxiety, and I did not practice what I learned. But the hours on the plane were very much ok.

              I have learned that this course can and will work, more than the many other techniques I have tried over the decades, I have also learned that I need to prepare and practice to really be anxiety free.

              I hope this post is helpful to anyone who is considering these techniques and wants to fly. I have had a phobia since I was 16. I have tried many different methods to try help. And each flight thenext 14 years was just awful, start to finish. To the point where I refused to fly for the last 15 years. Now I had 2 long flights, both with turbulence, and I was able to do them fairly well. Thank you!